The Foreskin Press

The Author

i dream of being free.

i beg to be unfettered.  i know i can do so much more. i want to be able to soar like an eagle, and i realize i’m fully able and capable of making magic out of my life.

but i’m too lazy to get off my fat arse and do something about it.

that pretty much sums up my life.  decadent, vain-glorious, blithe optimist, horny, uncommitted, fake and irreligious.

a decade in various cubicles has made Scott Adams my deity, and turned my once lithe self into a steadily bloating wheezing mass of sex-hungry flesh.

i also happen to be a gadget freak and an auto-lover, but am so far in debt that i can afford neither.

every low point in my life is highlighted by financial trauma, but every high point in my life features my friends and my family.  that’s a good thing, i’m sure of it.


My Family:

My parents live in Boston, and can only be described as long-suffering and patient.  My mom‘s waking prayer is to see me married.  As for my dad, i don’t know how he puts up with me.  I mean, seriously, even i wouldn’t put up with me.

My brother and his family live in Bangalore.  My sister-in-law is a wonderful person and i love her a lot.  I’m ashamed to say i never got to know my niece very well.  I’ve never been good with children.  But i hear she’s got her father’s appetite and her mother’s intelligence.

If they ever see this blog, they’ll disown me.  Yep, they will.

My man-servant and companion, Thuyavan, plays an important role in getting my life organized, cleaning up after me, protecting me from  assumed ‘baddies’, and sometimes even cooking for me.  All this happens when I’m not screaming at him for dropping things, spilling stuff, not answering his phone, sleeping in late, coming home drunk, weaving through traffic, getting caught by the cops, losing his mobile, running up the telephone and utility bills, forgetting the grocery and when I generally have a bad day at work.

I must concede that to me, he is family.

Vinoth Kumar is a lucky boy who gets pampered like nobody’s business simply because he has to put up with my temper tantrums, terrifying impatience, convoluted thought-processes and extreme delegation.  He is 21, good-natured, slow to anger, lazy yet ambitious, sharp, honest, up-front-and-in-your-face, optimistic, mature beyond his years, addicted to the gym and built like the proverbial brick shit-house.  keeping him clothed and fed costs about the same as the GDP of a small third-world country – but i do so gladly.

He’s the younger brother i never had.

My Friends:

They’ve been with me through thick and thin.  They’ve lost their patience with me too many times to count, but they still hang in there through sheer faith.  They’re the reason my days seem bright sometimes, but more often than not they make me blue.

They mean a lot to me.

I’m not ashamed to concede that I have a very few people I can honestly call friends.

You know who you are. Hang in there – I’ll come around eventually.

12 Responses to "The Author"

Have gone through your blog. Of course, I know you even before. Through earlier blog. Any ways nice to see you again. All the best.

Hey Sizzler,
I am in Chennai and lookout for the best bars and discothe for a dance and lots of girls around.

Can you suggest some?

hey are you around? i am coming back to chennai in january

julian from san francisco

Can you please tell me someting about this photograph?- foreskin-press-bridge-bandra-worli-giant-traffic-jam-snarl.jpg

I would like to obtain permission to use it in a small book of short stories about Mumbai, to add to my collection of 100 photographs.

Hoping you can help,


Real sorry – I picked this off the public domain (read Internet). I don’t recollect where.


> > everything passes by > >

Sent from my iPhone 4. Nothing compares.

so you are still sizzling?

Damn it!! i read this passage …. and something inside me goes like ‘awweeeeeeeeee…………’ kinda like the warm feeling u get….when u see a puppy!!
good stuff!

thank you, Royston! hope there’s more in my blog that makes you feel like a wet puppy!


hi i love ur attitude…


i like your attitude

and how often do you hit the target?

hmmmmmm? 😉

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