Posts Tagged ‘history’
Once a pretty much unheard-of sport, and completely dominated by the West, bodybuilding is now taking center-stage in India. What’s causing this sudden boom in body-building youth across the Nation’s gyms? Experts claim it’s the rising focus on health.
“Have you seen the number of gyms in Chennai!” exclaims a traveling bra salesman we spoke to. “There’s practically one on every street,” he claims while kneading a rather wrinkled 38-D in his hammy fist.
Doctor Ben Dover Ensayaah attributes it to the changing trends brought about by fashion and propagated by the ubiquitous television. “Look at the people we see on TV these days… Is there even one unfit soul? Even I’ve begun working on my abs. Wanna have a look?” And the doctor attempted to lift his shirt. Luckily this reporter managed to avert his eyes before any permanent damage was done.
However, fitness icon and guru, Reuben Robert, had an entirely different take on the subject. “It’s the rising income-levels,” he proclaimed. “Finally, we Indians can afford to eat, as against barely subsisting or surviving. Young men now have access to food that’s actually healthy for you and rich in nutrients!”
We later approached Reuben’s brother, professional bodybuilder Vinoth Kumar, for his views. “Why does everything have to be about how much I eat?” he growled, while shielding his plate of Tandoori Chicken. “As long as my ‘anna’ is paying for my diet, I’ll eat absolutely anything that can’t bite me back!” This reporter shudders at the narrow escape from those gnashing jaws.
Despite their low hygiene, lower IQs and non-existent morals, we are all in awe of the muscle-bound hunks around us.
While most people believe that bodybuilders are driven by a passion for strength, a fire for beating the limit, and sheer unbridled ambition, the truth is clear to only those in the know. More often than not, bodybuilders are driven purely by sheer conceit, the ability to dominate others, the sincere belief that they are superior humans and the God-like ability to be completely self-centered.
Remember, size does matter.
(click the link inside his blog to see his massive library of bodybuilding photos)
With the Indian state of Tamil Nadu taking the lead on enabling Transgendered and Transvestites, others are running to cash in on what is increasingly being seen as a populist move.
Predictably, the Shiv Sena took to the streets when news of the Maharashtra Government’s move to add a similar option to new ration cards being issued in the state claiming that the only faggots in the state were “foreign, Pakistani, policemen, Muslims, Christians and Bihari.”
“There is no place for homosexuals in our culture,” said an agitated Thackery. It was promptly pointed out that homosexuality is a part of Hinduism, and makes up a huge part of our history. “You are all mixed up. Even I have often confused semi-naked Indian mud-wrestlers at the Akharas I own with intense with sexual desire and longing,” he said panting hard. “The passion generated by watching two massive, muscular and manly men writhe together on our the sand of our motherland, skin on skin, and sweat mingling as one , is hard to resist. I must remind you that no Indian in our history has ever had sex with women, let alone with another man.”
The awkward silence was soon broken when the suddenly subdued Sena thugs began asking reporters to leave.
Later, discussions among visitors to the shocking Thackery news claimed to
have noticed the Sena supremo’s personal bodyguard, Bheem Bhai Kamalnath, share guilty glances with Thackery’s wife. No further developments have been reported.